Love Letters
by YoursXo
Summary: Love letters written between Jinx and Kid Flash! :D
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Jinx and Kid Flash only talk through letters now. They write about their heartaches and love. Hope you guys like it!**_

_**Summary: Love letters written between Jinx and Kid Flash! :D**_

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_Letter #1_

Dear Wally,  
It seems as though I can't seem to forget about you. You're on my mind. Day and night. Every second. All day, every day. You haunt me. I don't like it. But I don't hate it either. If that even makes any sense to you. I really hope it does. Even though it's confusing to I have daydreams about you. I like to think I haven't screwed everything up. I like to pretend we're still together. You know what pretending is, don't you? I'm sure you do. You're smart enough. Smarter than you look that's for sure. Bad luck. That's my excuse to why things ended so badly.

I'm hurt. Okay? I know I act as if nothing can hurt me. Even though that isn't true at all. You know that and I know that. You mean the world to me. I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am for dumping you. It was a stupid and impulsive decision. Now I'm all alone and I need you. I'm not exactly sure if I can make it without you. I'm growing weaker and weaker without you here beside me

I'm such a hypocrite! I know. You know. We both know. I miss you. I hate you. But I also love you more than life itself. Wally, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for breaking your heart. Yours wasn't the only one I broke in the process, though. Mine has suffered a great deal of pain with each day of your absence. I push and push you away with every intention of hurting you. I wouldn't blame you if you gave up on me, but that won't stop me from loving you. Absolutely nothing will. Life has no meaning without you. It's pointless. There's just no use going on without you in my life, without you loving me. This may sound desperate and stupid but you always wanted to know how I truly feel about you. So, here I am. Writing this letter to you while crying. I don't know why this is so hard. I guess you were right. I am falling in love with you. Only, I never realized it until after I hit the ground. Now you're gone. I'm alone. I miss you. I will always love you.

-Jinx

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Dear Jinx,

You broke my heart. All I ever wanted to do was help you. All you do is push me away! I can't believe you. It seems like you're intentionally trying to hurt me. Even though I wish this isn't true, I do remember what you were like before we met. So angry at the world. You were angry at everything. Sometimes I wish I hadn't met you. That way I wouldn't be hurting like this anymore. Pain is terrible. I can't function normally. I can't sleep. I can't eat. All I do is stare at my bedroom ceiling. I don't exactly know what I'm looking for. It's pointless.

I want you back. I don't want you back. I don't know what I want. Wait, I do. I want you to want me. I want you to need me the way that I need you. Jinx, you don't understand how much I need you to love me. Without you in my world I'm not me. I'm a horrid monster. I hate myself. Why? I'm not exactly sure why but I just do. Do you even love me? One minute you say you do and the next you don't. It's so confusing. I just wish you'd tell me how you really and truly feel about me because I'm going crazy here!

I hate being without you. I hate being alone. Without you, I'm nothing. Nothing. I miss you. Why did you tell me to leave? Are you afraid? Do you hate me as much as I think you do? Please, just tell me why. All I need to know is why. So. . . . _Why?_

-Wally


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/n: SO sorry about the late update! I have had no motivation to write this and then I had to go to the hospital for a couple days and I finally decided to work on this! Hope you guys like it(:**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans! :(**_

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Dear Wally,  
How have you been? Me? I've been absolutely terrible. My luck is down the drain. Then again, I've always been bad luck. Despite whether I want to admit it or not you were my lucky charm. Anything good that has happened to me in life was all because of you.

You made me happy. So happy that it horrified me. I'm afraid of being happy. Now you know my secret. Being happy makes me go crazy. You saw what it made me do. I lost my mind. I couldn't think straight. I was being nice to others. That's not me! Being happy isn't me. I don't like how crazy I got. My mind just seemed to stop working correctly. I was happy with you. Really, I was. But in that happiness something dark and scary took over me. I'm not exactly sure what it was or what it wanted from me. I'm pretty sure_ it_ wanted you. In the worst way possible.

Maybe I'm just not meant to be happy. You tried to help me. I know you did. I tried helping myself, too. Nothing seemed to work until I broke things off. I'm back to normal now and I feel bad that I don't have you anymore. I feel so lonely. This might have something to do with who I am and who I was born from. Yes, my parents could be the reason for my strange inner demon. It's the only explanation I have.

As you already know the last time I saw my parents was when I was an infant. They raised me together until I was about five. I was on my own after that. Sometimes I try to remember what my mother was like. Was she nice? Was she pretty? I don't know. My memory of my parents is so fuzzy, it's almost a complete blackout. You could say they're terrible for abandoning me. Maybe they are. How should I know? I grew up all alone. I'm always alone. Even with the Hive Five I was alone. That is until you came along.

You mean absolutely everything to me. When I broke it off with you, I thought it was best for the both of us. What I didn't seem to realize was that it wasn't good for either of us. I love you. I love you. I love you and I love you. Why is that so hard for me to admit this out loud? Love sucks and my heart is broken. I miss you.

-Jinx

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Dear Jinx,  
Life is getting so hard without you. I don't like living by myself. I stay up every single night thinking of you. I hate being without you. You're killing me, Jinx! The day you left me I told you that I was in love with you. All you did was run away. I don't blame you for leaving me. I just thought and hopes that you loved me, too. When you were with me everything was absolutely perfect. I never saw you happy before. In the short time that I did, you acted out in a very strange way. You didn't think clearly. You scared me. Something inside you turned dark.

I don't like to think about how crazy you got. If I think about it, I worry. If I worry, I miss you even more. My heart aches. It's like there's a hollow spot where it should be. Where you should be. I feel nothing but pain and sadness without you. No matter what I do, I can't seem to forget you. I hope you'll give me another chance someday. If not then I guess I'll just move on. Eventually.

And if in time, I can't. Which I know I won't be able too. . . hopefully you'll take me back. At some point you just have to! Without you my life is a nightmare. It may be bad for you if we're together but for me life is a _nightmare_ without you! You have to take my feelings into consideration before you make rash decisions like this, Jinx. I need you. I need you. I need you. I feel like I'm suffocating in your absence. I've been awake for days. Knowing that if I sleep, I'll dream of you. That will only make matters worse. Do you realize how I even feel? I feel miserable. I won't fully describe to you the pain you're putting me through because I don't wish for you to know.

Can you promise me something? If so, please promise me that if you don't find anyone else that you'll come back to me. I don't know how much longer I can go on without you. All I know is that you are the only reason I have for waking up in the morning. You are all I want, all that I need, and you are all that I'll ever need for the rest of my life. I'm in love with you, Jinx. I always have been and I always will be. Whenever you need me, I'll be here for you.  
-Wally


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: I hope you enjoy(:**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans.**_

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Dear Wally,

This loneliness is killing me. I hate feeling so alone. While I was with you, I didn't feel lonely at all. I miss being with you. And I hate it. I'm an independent girl. I shouldn't have to depend on anyone for help or feelings of love or anything really. I get by well enough on my own and I think I'm okay with the life I'm living. Without you, though I feel almost. . . lost. I am empty. Knowing that we're broken up after dating for over a year makes me feel sick inside. A sickness that medicine can't cure. You were the only person who ever truly cared about me enough to keep me around (well, besides the Hive Five).

How do you feel without me in your life? Angry? Sad? I just really need to know. Being with you made me feel incredible, yet it also made me erratic and psychotic as well. I'm still trying to process the events that led me to this conclusion and have come up with vitrually nothing. All I can think of is maybe I was too happy. And the world just can't handle me when I'm too happy. Happy for me is a death-wish on all humanity. My solution was to keep you as far away as possible. Sure there was probably a better solution for this problem and mayble I'll find that out while I'm here away from you. But I really do miss you, Wally.

I'm starting to forget. I can't remember the way you smelled, the color of your eyes, and I can't remember the sound of your laugh. Sometimes when I'm sleeping I think I can remember you. And then I can't. It's all in my head. It's been months since we've seen each other last. Months since I broke up with you and ended everything. Despite what I want to believe I can't seem to move on.

I thought this would be easier for me as the person to end things. It is far from easy. This has to be the hardest and most painful thing that I've ever had to do. . . . live without you. You are perfect to me and I don't want you to forget that. None of this is your fault. It's all my fault. It's me. This probably sounds really cliche. I'm so sorry, it's the truth. Hopefully in time we can find a reasonable solution. Until then I don't think we can see each other in person.

-Jinx

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Dear Jinx,

I hope you're doing well. Or at least, better than you were last year. I want you to know that I'm not bitter about you dumping me. After thinking about it over and over non-stop for the past couple of months I realized that you were trying to do the best thing for you. Despite feeling horribly upset about being without you, I've learned to cope with the emptiness I'm feeling. It was hard for me to do. And it took a long time for me to accept that you might not come back to me.  
Now, I think I should tell you that I won't date other girls. This may or may not be because of you. When you broke my heart when you dumped me. You took it and smashed it into a million different pieces. I know you didn't mean to hurt me. Or so you've told me in your letters. At first I didn't believe you then I read your words and finally understood.

But I can't date another girl. I won't date another girl. I don't want to. Deep down, I know that you're the only one for me. I know that you know this too. I can tell it by the way you write to me. Maybe you don't know it just yet. In time, I think you'll figure it out. You're a very smart girl. Jinx. . . I really love you. That isn't changing anytime soon. I don't think it will ever change. This is the sad truth that I have to live with and face every single day until the end of time.

You are the only person I care about. I care about you so much that I just can't seem to function normally without you. I can feel myself getting to a dark place. One that I've never been in before. It hurts me to know that I may never be with you again and it scares me to death to know you may never want to be with me. All I have left to say is that I miss you and I'm lonely. I've never been lonely before, because I always had you. And now I just. . . don't. Everything feels so wrong without you. You were the only good thing I had going for me. Now, I have nothing.

I enjoy hearing from you. It helps me sort out these feelings. Even though we haven't seen each other in months, I still remember you. Everything we ever did together was perfect. Even though it wasn't good for you mentally, I always thought we'd work out somehow. I could be wrong but I really hope I'm not. You're so lovely, Jinx. Bad luck or not I don't care what you say. I love you. I will always love you.

-Wally


End file.
